In case they see this, I will preface this post by saying that I love my mother and sister dearly. They are both Costco members and I had the chance to go to Costco for the first time in my life Saturday. I figured, I have been unemployed so i need to consider buying in bulk. What was I thinking?
It was an interesting experience - a bit scary - but interesting.
Our journey began with a huge influx of Costco faithfuls pouring into the Costco near Castleton. It was nearly 100 degrees out so it was very warm inside the Costco warehouse. I spent much of my time in the fresh vegetable and fruit section which was a food freezer. The temperature was just right for me.
I must admit that i have never seen some of the items sold at Costco. Four pound boxes of Cheese Its, 2 pound containers of mustard. I like mustard a lot but I don't really have anywhere to store 2 pounds of mustard. Then there was the 48 rolls of toilet paper. Imagine how many houses you could TP with that much toilet paper!
They had free food samples so I thought maybe I would be able to grab a quick lunch of food samples. But the food samples were weird!!! Black bean burgers! Dill pickles! Greek yogurt! Humus! Yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck! Who eats this stuff?!? (My sister - that's who and Kathy Sanders!).
Where were the pizza samples and chips/dip, pork chops, brownies, any real food?
I also visited the pharmacy section where you can buy bulk vitamins and medication. I nearly got a 248 count tylenol but it wouldn't fit in my medicine cabinet. I also wanted to get a 3 pound container of Fred Flintstone vitamins, (those things taste awesome) but wasn't sure if Fred Flintstone vitamins work for adults.
I settled on getting two toasters, an iron, 120 pack of dryer sheets, (I will never have to purchase these again!), water and gatorade.
Mom - thanks for an experience I will never forget. Unless Dave and I decide to adopt 12 or more children, I think I will just shop at regular grocery stores from now on - big containers of food, much like big people, scare me.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Friday, May 25, 2012
Urine Testing and Paperwork
Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled to have a new job. However, the e-mails I continue to get to fill out paperwork are astounding. I have received 20 plus e-mails asking me to print paperwork, sign it, scan it and e-mail it back. They obviously don't realize that I have afternoon naps to take and food to eat. Gosh!
And I had the pleasure of going to a lab at 71st street in Indy to take a urine test. Now this is a test I know I can pass - with flying colors. However, the lab "technician" or pervert or whatever she was, wanted to watch me urinate. I declined that fabulous offer and informed her that only DOL employees have to be observed when peeing - believe me I did my research on this one. She then wanted me to crack the bathroom door so she could hear me. I told her she could pat me down or what ever she wanted but I can't pee if people are observing. So she opted to stand outside the bathroom door and listen - urine fetish I guess.
I normally have to go to the bathroom rather frequently. Of course, once I had an audience, I could not go to save my life. So I was then informed by Penny the Pee perv that I could not leave the collection clinic until I peed in the cup or it would be noted as a refusal to comply. What the heck! So I drank over 40 ounces, (no lie) of water trying to coax my bladder. I finally was able to give the minimum amount of urine.
Of course I got no sleep last night because I had to pee every 2 hours from all the water.
At least I will take some satisfaction in knowing that "Penny" has to handle other people's urine all day!
And I had the pleasure of going to a lab at 71st street in Indy to take a urine test. Now this is a test I know I can pass - with flying colors. However, the lab "technician" or pervert or whatever she was, wanted to watch me urinate. I declined that fabulous offer and informed her that only DOL employees have to be observed when peeing - believe me I did my research on this one. She then wanted me to crack the bathroom door so she could hear me. I told her she could pat me down or what ever she wanted but I can't pee if people are observing. So she opted to stand outside the bathroom door and listen - urine fetish I guess.
I normally have to go to the bathroom rather frequently. Of course, once I had an audience, I could not go to save my life. So I was then informed by Penny the Pee perv that I could not leave the collection clinic until I peed in the cup or it would be noted as a refusal to comply. What the heck! So I drank over 40 ounces, (no lie) of water trying to coax my bladder. I finally was able to give the minimum amount of urine.
Of course I got no sleep last night because I had to pee every 2 hours from all the water.
At least I will take some satisfaction in knowing that "Penny" has to handle other people's urine all day!
Monday, May 21, 2012
Kill the Chipmunks...
I really need to start work soon, for several reasons. First, I have become obsessed with my flowers this year - I'm like a crazy old lady with 100 cats only I have 100 flowers. I planted some very pretty Gerber Daisies. They were awesome. Then came the chipmunks. Now, normally, I like chipmunks. They seemed all cute and whatnot. Now I want to kill the chipmunks. They are eating my plants. And they are fast little suckers. Can't catch them with my hands. Maybe I will go all Hunger Games on them and set traps and such. Are you beginning to see why I need work?!?
Second, my brain is slowly decreasing in capability. As I mentioned before, I have received an offer from a great company. The offer was verbal and I have been awaiting a written offer for over a week. I was complaining to my husband this morning about the negative candidate experience I was having and that I was tempted to call my new boss and tell her that I didn't know if I wanted to take the job as I have received no communication. Then I realized that I am a complete moron who didn't know how to check my cell phone for voicemail messages. My future employer, (unless they realize how dumb I am) had left three messages asking me to provide some information on-line. DUH! I promptly called the Recruiter and completed the information at warp speed.
Maybe chipmunk hunting will sharpen my mind. I'm heading to Walmart now for some camo and ammo and black face paint. Those two chipmunks don't stand a chance.
Second, my brain is slowly decreasing in capability. As I mentioned before, I have received an offer from a great company. The offer was verbal and I have been awaiting a written offer for over a week. I was complaining to my husband this morning about the negative candidate experience I was having and that I was tempted to call my new boss and tell her that I didn't know if I wanted to take the job as I have received no communication. Then I realized that I am a complete moron who didn't know how to check my cell phone for voicemail messages. My future employer, (unless they realize how dumb I am) had left three messages asking me to provide some information on-line. DUH! I promptly called the Recruiter and completed the information at warp speed.
Maybe chipmunk hunting will sharpen my mind. I'm heading to Walmart now for some camo and ammo and black face paint. Those two chipmunks don't stand a chance.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Year of the Skunk
So, I have officially been disinherited by my father for the Merle Haggard comments. I stand by my statements. Freedom of speech and all that!!
The more I think about 2012, the more I believe it is a year that will go down as having a stinky start!! First, Dave has to have open heart surgery, then I leave Roche without another job and do the unemployment thing, then Chelsea has to start the kidney transplant process and THEN she has to get her tonsils out. And I was promised tickets to Zoobilation by my ex-employer which are now out of the question. AND my baby boy will be a Senior next school year! So I am old and it has been a crappy year so far. Other cultures have years named for animals - year of the monkey, year of the snake, etc. I deem 2012 the Year of the Skunk for its stinkiness.
Maybe the second half of 2012 will be the year of the Puppy, (everyone loves a puppy - right - cute, cuddly, fun, happy!). I mean there have been some signs that things are changing...I almost have a job, (still waiting for that paper offer letter. My new employer uses Taleo as Roche does and are awaiting approval of the requisition in the system. Apparently the Finance approver is on vacation and has no system proxy). And I have read a lot of books that had been collecting dust for years. And I have an awesome tan - sitting outside drinking my iced tea has become a ritual for me. My kids are gorgeous and I no longer spend time in the underbelly of the Fishers Library, (BTW, one of my contacts from the underbelly has informed me that Laqueesha is back. Apparently her ability to do good hair was all in her mind. I might go back into the underbelly and do a documentary or short story featuring Laqueesha). Oh, and all of you have been so kind and helpful that I realize "you like me, you really like me!" (For those youngsters in the audience, that was a Sally Field shoutout).
Well, I have to go back to my latest venture - online college courses that your tax dollars pay for me to take!! I am studying Philosophy. It makes my brain tired to try to keep up with all the arguments people spend time making up in Philosophy. And the questions on the weekly assignments are really not meant to be answered...What's the meaning of life?...Who is God?...What is most real or ultimately real? What the heck!!! I should have taken HR 101!
The more I think about 2012, the more I believe it is a year that will go down as having a stinky start!! First, Dave has to have open heart surgery, then I leave Roche without another job and do the unemployment thing, then Chelsea has to start the kidney transplant process and THEN she has to get her tonsils out. And I was promised tickets to Zoobilation by my ex-employer which are now out of the question. AND my baby boy will be a Senior next school year! So I am old and it has been a crappy year so far. Other cultures have years named for animals - year of the monkey, year of the snake, etc. I deem 2012 the Year of the Skunk for its stinkiness.
Maybe the second half of 2012 will be the year of the Puppy, (everyone loves a puppy - right - cute, cuddly, fun, happy!). I mean there have been some signs that things are changing...I almost have a job, (still waiting for that paper offer letter. My new employer uses Taleo as Roche does and are awaiting approval of the requisition in the system. Apparently the Finance approver is on vacation and has no system proxy). And I have read a lot of books that had been collecting dust for years. And I have an awesome tan - sitting outside drinking my iced tea has become a ritual for me. My kids are gorgeous and I no longer spend time in the underbelly of the Fishers Library, (BTW, one of my contacts from the underbelly has informed me that Laqueesha is back. Apparently her ability to do good hair was all in her mind. I might go back into the underbelly and do a documentary or short story featuring Laqueesha). Oh, and all of you have been so kind and helpful that I realize "you like me, you really like me!" (For those youngsters in the audience, that was a Sally Field shoutout).
Well, I have to go back to my latest venture - online college courses that your tax dollars pay for me to take!! I am studying Philosophy. It makes my brain tired to try to keep up with all the arguments people spend time making up in Philosophy. And the questions on the weekly assignments are really not meant to be answered...What's the meaning of life?...Who is God?...What is most real or ultimately real? What the heck!!! I should have taken HR 101!
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Merle Haggard ain't my cup of tea...
I will apologize in advance to my father for this post. But one more day at home with David playing Merle Haggard on his computer might cause me to go off the deep end. For those of you who don't know who Merle is, (I unfortunately grew up with him playing and then my dad decided to give my husband the gift that keeps on giving - every Merle song on a CD collection!) Google him and listen to part of a song. That is all it will take. Seriously. The man has smoked himself almost to death so he has a very gravel-like voice and quite the twang!!
I'm not a big country music fan to start with, then you add a little Merle and even some George Strait and you get a "Deliverance" type feel.
Wow - I will try to concentrate on the blog. Hard to keep my toes from tapping to the background music.
I'm now learning even more about the patience of the job search and final information. I was offered a job Friday evening and I am still awaiting a written offer. Patience my be a virtue, but I have never been good at being patient. I want to just call the employer and tell them I'll draft my own offer letter to get it done. But I'm thinking that might not be the first impression I want to create. They will find out soon enough how I am.
This role is located quite a way from Fishers so I will have to live during the week at another location. I'm realizing that I will have to create a second household for this venture. Argh! Do you think that if i left David, (which is a possibility with the whole Merle thing) and got engaged to someone else, I could get people to come to a bridal shower so I could get all the household stuff I need again? Probably more work than it's worth.
Hopefully, tomorrow I will receive the written offer. If not, I will have no choice but to continue the job search and I really don't want to do that.
Oh - we just switched from Merle to the song, "Swanging". Help me....
I'm not a big country music fan to start with, then you add a little Merle and even some George Strait and you get a "Deliverance" type feel.
Wow - I will try to concentrate on the blog. Hard to keep my toes from tapping to the background music.
I'm now learning even more about the patience of the job search and final information. I was offered a job Friday evening and I am still awaiting a written offer. Patience my be a virtue, but I have never been good at being patient. I want to just call the employer and tell them I'll draft my own offer letter to get it done. But I'm thinking that might not be the first impression I want to create. They will find out soon enough how I am.
This role is located quite a way from Fishers so I will have to live during the week at another location. I'm realizing that I will have to create a second household for this venture. Argh! Do you think that if i left David, (which is a possibility with the whole Merle thing) and got engaged to someone else, I could get people to come to a bridal shower so I could get all the household stuff I need again? Probably more work than it's worth.
Hopefully, tomorrow I will receive the written offer. If not, I will have no choice but to continue the job search and I really don't want to do that.
Oh - we just switched from Merle to the song, "Swanging". Help me....
Monday, May 14, 2012
Life Moves Fast
Well, my blogs have slowed down but so have I. A serious moment - life goes by fast. I hope my unemployment experience is a lasting booster shot to remember to focus on what is important in life.
2012 will be a year that I will never forget - Dave's heart surgery, leaving Roche, starting with a new company, (I received a verbal offer Friday night!!!) and helping Chelsea through kidney issues again, (we learned Friday that she is in end-stage renal failure so we will be getting tested and visiting a transplant center this month). Whew - all that and a mammogram. I deserve a plaque or medal or something!!!!
Noah had prom Saturday night. He is a piece of work. He looked so handsome in his tuxedo. And he has not a shy bone in his body so he was the first to hit the dance floor and showed his skills showing people "how to dougie" - whatever that is! Hopefully it's not something obscene!!
Mother's Day was another experience altogether. I had a nice lunch with my mom and siblings, (got her a Peyton Manning Denver shirt, along with my brother, so I'm in pretty good standing there!) then all hell broke loose. My children are 17 and 21 years old. They might as well be 2 and 3 years old. They fought most of the day. Makes me proud of my mothering skills - NOT!
Back to job learnings - the new job, (I'm afraid to give too many details or I'll jinx it) will be working with a large population of only male employees. Now, I truly love most of the people I worked with on a daily basis at Roche. But Roche HR is 99.9% female and that ain't so fun. Women can be mean, mean people. They say that women's "cycles", (yeah - I'm going there) align when they live or work together. Our team had like 15 women in a close work area who were either all experiencing a visit from "Aunt Flo" at the same time or were going through pre or actual menopause and wanted to shed clothing because of hot flashes. No joke, for the men in the audience and younger females, a hot flash is like someone starting a fire in all your bones and you are cooking from the inside out - you pore sweat. It is so not pretty. In one meeting, my own boss said, "How gross!" at my profuse sweating. Really boasts a female's confidence.
SOOOOO...I'm looking forward to all men in the workplace. They asked if I would be intimidated - I giggled and said I thought I could handle it. My husband has begun praying for those poor men. I'm not sure how to take that.
Well - I will keep the learning coming, even as I re-enter the workforce. I can't wait for the drug screen - that is one test I know I can pass!!!!
2012 will be a year that I will never forget - Dave's heart surgery, leaving Roche, starting with a new company, (I received a verbal offer Friday night!!!) and helping Chelsea through kidney issues again, (we learned Friday that she is in end-stage renal failure so we will be getting tested and visiting a transplant center this month). Whew - all that and a mammogram. I deserve a plaque or medal or something!!!!
Noah had prom Saturday night. He is a piece of work. He looked so handsome in his tuxedo. And he has not a shy bone in his body so he was the first to hit the dance floor and showed his skills showing people "how to dougie" - whatever that is! Hopefully it's not something obscene!!
Mother's Day was another experience altogether. I had a nice lunch with my mom and siblings, (got her a Peyton Manning Denver shirt, along with my brother, so I'm in pretty good standing there!) then all hell broke loose. My children are 17 and 21 years old. They might as well be 2 and 3 years old. They fought most of the day. Makes me proud of my mothering skills - NOT!
Back to job learnings - the new job, (I'm afraid to give too many details or I'll jinx it) will be working with a large population of only male employees. Now, I truly love most of the people I worked with on a daily basis at Roche. But Roche HR is 99.9% female and that ain't so fun. Women can be mean, mean people. They say that women's "cycles", (yeah - I'm going there) align when they live or work together. Our team had like 15 women in a close work area who were either all experiencing a visit from "Aunt Flo" at the same time or were going through pre or actual menopause and wanted to shed clothing because of hot flashes. No joke, for the men in the audience and younger females, a hot flash is like someone starting a fire in all your bones and you are cooking from the inside out - you pore sweat. It is so not pretty. In one meeting, my own boss said, "How gross!" at my profuse sweating. Really boasts a female's confidence.
SOOOOO...I'm looking forward to all men in the workplace. They asked if I would be intimidated - I giggled and said I thought I could handle it. My husband has begun praying for those poor men. I'm not sure how to take that.
Well - I will keep the learning coming, even as I re-enter the workforce. I can't wait for the drug screen - that is one test I know I can pass!!!!
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Can't we all work together?
I have begun to think of ways that all people who want to work should be able to work.
If I am ever elected president, (a phrase my husband loves to use!) my first act of power will be to implement these ideas:
If I am ever elected president, (a phrase my husband loves to use!) my first act of power will be to implement these ideas:
- All states will become no-fault employment states and implement 120-day probationary periods for all new hires, all levels. No more fancy pants recruiting systems. No more of the 4, 5 and 6 rounds of interviewing. Good old fashioned resume review, maybe a phone screen and the hiring Leader gets to interview and make the decision. First twenty five applicants then the job posting is deactived. No more consensus of candidate. A leader needs to have a backbone and take credit for good and bad hiring decisions.
- With all the money that no longer has to go to applicant tracking systems, companies can reward employees who are performing well.
- No video conference interviews - having a leader or candidates face frozen in an awkward position on video doesn't help anyone.
- If companies have executive approach to fill jobs, they have 30 days to do so or they lose the headcount. If they have other priorities during that time they can either designate a hiring decision proxy or quit their job as they seem fairly stupid to me if hiring talented people isn't a top priority.
- No one can make over 5 million per year. It's just wrong. Even if you win the lottery. Even if you are a celebrity.
- No carpet or wallpaper allowed in offices that is over 5 years old - it just gets to smelling and looking funky - yuck!
- No pizza for work lunches - just makes the workers unhealthy and screams, "we got the cheapest meal we could today as we try to extract work from you!!!!"
- Unemployment insurance goes away. No one should be unemployed for more than 30 days with my new system. Which means the mean ladies at the unemployment office have to look for work themselves - Karma baby!
- PowerPoints will be banned. People will simply have to draw their ideas or talk with other people. Cartoons or short documentaries are allowed.
- No meetings for more than 1 hour. And don't even try to cheat the system - I'm president for heaven's sake, no sneaking past me - you can't do back-to-back 1 hour meetings on the same topic.
- Medical, childcare and dental coverage will be provided by the U.S. government with all the money they will save with no unemployment and no welfare for non-working people. Insurance companies, (one of which turned me down 6 months ago for a job) will no longer be needed - more money that can go elsewhere.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
411
Okay, I think I have a few more job ideas as well as some helpful information for all of you.
First to the job ideas -- computer rental for recently unemployed professionals who were using their company computer as their own personal computer, (although, everyone should experience someone like Laqueesha) cell phone patrol agent - I would love to taser every person who attempts to drive with their cell phone to their ear or walks through the grocery store talking on the phone, personal space consultant - we seem to have consultants for everything from organizing to what to wear, (I knew I shouldn't have worn those pajama-looking pants to work that one day) so why not have someone to coach "close talkers" regarding personal distance, personal hygiene coach - need I explain more?, professional food taster and critic - if Rachel Ray could do it on $40 per day - I can do it on $35, mattress tester - my sleeping skills have gotten super good, Walt Disney World Secret Shopper, and Laqueesha's nail polish caddy - that girl has to have a huge supply of nail polish!
Now for the 411 - This is a serious one for those of you working at Roche. Roche's Anthem insurance allows you to get medical massages, (I know - I just talked about personal space and now I'm endorsing massages but you gotta love massages! Unless your name begins with N and you are a lousy driver) for $15 for a one hour massage. And, for those adventurous enough to utilize a chiropractor, you can get a realignment and massage combo for just $15!!! I have taken to needing medical massages weekly! If anyone wants to take advantage - I use Synergy/Abby Eaton and the phone number is 594-0004.
One last thought - I'd love your input - I'm thinking of adding a Glamour Shots to my interview portfolio - what do you think? With a pink boa and a bunch of make-up!!!!
First to the job ideas -- computer rental for recently unemployed professionals who were using their company computer as their own personal computer, (although, everyone should experience someone like Laqueesha) cell phone patrol agent - I would love to taser every person who attempts to drive with their cell phone to their ear or walks through the grocery store talking on the phone, personal space consultant - we seem to have consultants for everything from organizing to what to wear, (I knew I shouldn't have worn those pajama-looking pants to work that one day) so why not have someone to coach "close talkers" regarding personal distance, personal hygiene coach - need I explain more?, professional food taster and critic - if Rachel Ray could do it on $40 per day - I can do it on $35, mattress tester - my sleeping skills have gotten super good, Walt Disney World Secret Shopper, and Laqueesha's nail polish caddy - that girl has to have a huge supply of nail polish!
Now for the 411 - This is a serious one for those of you working at Roche. Roche's Anthem insurance allows you to get medical massages, (I know - I just talked about personal space and now I'm endorsing massages but you gotta love massages! Unless your name begins with N and you are a lousy driver) for $15 for a one hour massage. And, for those adventurous enough to utilize a chiropractor, you can get a realignment and massage combo for just $15!!! I have taken to needing medical massages weekly! If anyone wants to take advantage - I use Synergy/Abby Eaton and the phone number is 594-0004.
One last thought - I'd love your input - I'm thinking of adding a Glamour Shots to my interview portfolio - what do you think? With a pink boa and a bunch of make-up!!!!
Monday, May 7, 2012
Portfolio and Other Fun Stuff
Man do I have a lot to share with you today!!!!
I had a full day, (8 a.m. to 6:30 p.m.) of interviewing with a company today. Wow - 10.5 hours of work, not to mention interviewing, is really exhausting. As I re-enter the workforce, I believe I'll ask my future employer if I can ease back into work - maybe 4-5 hours per day!!
The interviews were fascinating. People are so interesting. The 10 people I interviewed with today were all very different from each other. Several Scientists - scary smart folks, some HR people - genuine people who are in it for the business and passion for the role versus superficial reasons, (yeah - you all know who I'm poking at with that comment) and several Sales Leaders. I don't know what it is about Sales people but I just get the biggest kick out of talking with them. It's like they have the gift for gab and they mesmerize me with their "fancy talk". Most times I don't really know what point they are making but it sounds so darn good that I find myself shaking my head in agreement!
This was the first interview in my life in which I used a portfolio to show my interviews samples of my work. Very effective way to go about selling your abilities! Other than the downside of having to lug around a heavy binder of my wares, it was much easier to talk from this binder than to come up with new examples each interview. Thanks to Kim for your help in "Marketing" my abilities. I sometimes think you believe in my abilities more than I do!!
It also sounds really impressive to tell interviews that you have brought your portfolio - so artistic and professional sounding, don't you think? I had lunch with a friend last week and mentioned that I was building my portfolio - she seemed puzzled that I hadn't already created one. She always was the smart one on the HR team!!!!
There were two negative things about today, however. First, I had to wear fancy shoes - I have been wearing flip flops for nearly two months. I really don't see why flip flops are not acceptable business attire. You know we all want to wear them to work. And even the highest level executives wear them on the weekends. So why not cut through the bull and wear what we all want to wear!?!?!? I'm going to be limping for the next week or so. The second negative was in the category of food. I love food. Those of you who know me well know that I prefer unhealthy food and I have an awful sweet tooth. I will eat just about anything - EXCEPT SUSHI. And where did they take me for lunch...a sushi restaurant. I swear whatever I tried to eat was still moving a bit as I tried to swallow it. The other issue with food was at breakfast. The woman who would be my boss took me to breakfast. She was a skinny little thing - all healthy and such. She took me to a pancake restaurant. And she ordered a small bowl of oatmeal and a banana. I really did think long and hard about ordering the same thing and giving the appearance of a healthy mindset but...I couldn't do it. I mean, what is the point of going to a good pancake house and getting oatmeal?? I can fix oatmeal at home. I chose to go with the impressive choice of eggs Benedict with potato cakes - OMG! Good eats! I think I made her throw up a bit in her mouth when I smothered my potato cakes with ketchup. At least she knows, should I join her team and there is ever a company eating contest, I can represent her team well!!!
Thanks to all of you who helped me prepare for these interviews. Other than my gluttony, I hit it out of the park in the interviews. By hour 10, my brain was a bit mushy but I was interviewing with a Sr. VP of Sales and he had a great sense of humor so he just made fun of my dead brain. It was a nice end to the day.
I had a full day, (8 a.m. to 6:30 p.m.) of interviewing with a company today. Wow - 10.5 hours of work, not to mention interviewing, is really exhausting. As I re-enter the workforce, I believe I'll ask my future employer if I can ease back into work - maybe 4-5 hours per day!!
The interviews were fascinating. People are so interesting. The 10 people I interviewed with today were all very different from each other. Several Scientists - scary smart folks, some HR people - genuine people who are in it for the business and passion for the role versus superficial reasons, (yeah - you all know who I'm poking at with that comment) and several Sales Leaders. I don't know what it is about Sales people but I just get the biggest kick out of talking with them. It's like they have the gift for gab and they mesmerize me with their "fancy talk". Most times I don't really know what point they are making but it sounds so darn good that I find myself shaking my head in agreement!
This was the first interview in my life in which I used a portfolio to show my interviews samples of my work. Very effective way to go about selling your abilities! Other than the downside of having to lug around a heavy binder of my wares, it was much easier to talk from this binder than to come up with new examples each interview. Thanks to Kim for your help in "Marketing" my abilities. I sometimes think you believe in my abilities more than I do!!
It also sounds really impressive to tell interviews that you have brought your portfolio - so artistic and professional sounding, don't you think? I had lunch with a friend last week and mentioned that I was building my portfolio - she seemed puzzled that I hadn't already created one. She always was the smart one on the HR team!!!!
There were two negative things about today, however. First, I had to wear fancy shoes - I have been wearing flip flops for nearly two months. I really don't see why flip flops are not acceptable business attire. You know we all want to wear them to work. And even the highest level executives wear them on the weekends. So why not cut through the bull and wear what we all want to wear!?!?!? I'm going to be limping for the next week or so. The second negative was in the category of food. I love food. Those of you who know me well know that I prefer unhealthy food and I have an awful sweet tooth. I will eat just about anything - EXCEPT SUSHI. And where did they take me for lunch...a sushi restaurant. I swear whatever I tried to eat was still moving a bit as I tried to swallow it. The other issue with food was at breakfast. The woman who would be my boss took me to breakfast. She was a skinny little thing - all healthy and such. She took me to a pancake restaurant. And she ordered a small bowl of oatmeal and a banana. I really did think long and hard about ordering the same thing and giving the appearance of a healthy mindset but...I couldn't do it. I mean, what is the point of going to a good pancake house and getting oatmeal?? I can fix oatmeal at home. I chose to go with the impressive choice of eggs Benedict with potato cakes - OMG! Good eats! I think I made her throw up a bit in her mouth when I smothered my potato cakes with ketchup. At least she knows, should I join her team and there is ever a company eating contest, I can represent her team well!!!
Thanks to all of you who helped me prepare for these interviews. Other than my gluttony, I hit it out of the park in the interviews. By hour 10, my brain was a bit mushy but I was interviewing with a Sr. VP of Sales and he had a great sense of humor so he just made fun of my dead brain. It was a nice end to the day.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Work Gets in the Way
So sorry I have not blogged for a few days. Those pesky employers have been calling me and wanting me to take time away from my busy blogging and sleeping schedule to talk with them. The nerve of those people!! Don't they realize I'm trying to take care of personal stuff right now!? Oh well.
I am really enjoying the new PC - and a shout out to my sister regarding her comment to me that I should come out of the dark ages and get a Mac...there is one Mac I will invest my money in - A BIG MAC. It really comes down to a matter of preference. Neither is better than the other when you consider cost, capability, size, etc. It's like saying republicans are better than democrats - there is no emperical evidence to support either argument. The "evidence" used by Mac users is that Macs are easier to use - as judged by the Mac user crowd. Enough about that - I prefer PC's. I'm sure Macs are wonderful but I prefer my PC. It's a little tiny thing with enough memory for my needs and only 3 pounds to carry when I again travel abroad.
I have final interviews next week at a company I really like. I'm hopeful all goes well and a good offer will be on its way to me mid next week.
I have realized that I do miss some things about work - birthday or promotion parties where cake is served, company provided lunches, having co-workers make fun of my daily tea container as a urine sample gone really wrong, and stealing sweets from other team's lunch or afternoon snack tables outside of the Staffing area, (Lisa - keep the tradition alive, please). I also miss the laughter. Not at me, with me! :) I do not miss panty hose, dress shoes, getting up early, wearing make-up daily, all day meetings and Bob - those at Roche know what I'm talking about - a wooden dummy as a reminder of our customers - what does that say about Roche customers?
I am really enjoying the new PC - and a shout out to my sister regarding her comment to me that I should come out of the dark ages and get a Mac...there is one Mac I will invest my money in - A BIG MAC. It really comes down to a matter of preference. Neither is better than the other when you consider cost, capability, size, etc. It's like saying republicans are better than democrats - there is no emperical evidence to support either argument. The "evidence" used by Mac users is that Macs are easier to use - as judged by the Mac user crowd. Enough about that - I prefer PC's. I'm sure Macs are wonderful but I prefer my PC. It's a little tiny thing with enough memory for my needs and only 3 pounds to carry when I again travel abroad.
I have final interviews next week at a company I really like. I'm hopeful all goes well and a good offer will be on its way to me mid next week.
I have realized that I do miss some things about work - birthday or promotion parties where cake is served, company provided lunches, having co-workers make fun of my daily tea container as a urine sample gone really wrong, and stealing sweets from other team's lunch or afternoon snack tables outside of the Staffing area, (Lisa - keep the tradition alive, please). I also miss the laughter. Not at me, with me! :) I do not miss panty hose, dress shoes, getting up early, wearing make-up daily, all day meetings and Bob - those at Roche know what I'm talking about - a wooden dummy as a reminder of our customers - what does that say about Roche customers?
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